So Tired Of The Fight

I hate my job, and I'm sure others feel that way as well. While nobody is shooting bullets at me, I am miserable but can't quit. I must hang on for the family, because of my responsibilities to them. 2 kids are in college and 2 more right behind them. I'd like to think I'm trusting in the Lord during this trial, but I am not. In fact I've lost some of my faith, because of the last 15 months of work hell. I try to keep everything to myself, because I don't want to drag anyone down; wife & kids shouldn't have to worry. I have a brother who works extremely hard for minimum wage; he'd love to make what I do. I am trapped and ready to quit at any minute; my resignation is ready to print.  I've started looking for another job, because I cannot continue this. It will impact my family greatly to go from +$20 a hour to whatever u end up. Will J & Rx be able to go to college if I do this? With no hope in sight I've thought about bumping up the life insurance and checking out. I haven't had serious thoughts, and that's more stupidity and selfish in my part. I'm hoping to find a new position that gives me the ability to provide for my family, and releases me from the clutches of depression I now find myself in. Lord, I'm ashamed I've stop trusting in you, but I'm so tired of this.